It’s late. I have been up painting and I briefly checked twitter and my entire feed full of tweets about the Dallas sniper shooting. I’ve hardly finished processing the Pulse shooting in Orlando let alone the shootings of Philando Castile in Michigan and Alton Sterling in Louisiana that have happened this week and now the Dallas sniper shooting has made me burst.
I’m absolutely devastated. I am sick, crying, confused, scared and angry. My heart hurts and I can’t stop getting the chills as I attempt to make sense and figure out how to explain what is happening in our country right now
We don’t need to wait to find out what the intent of the Dallas attack to know that the violence in this country has escalated and crossed a boundary that seriously threatens the safety of every person in this country.
I usually don’t speak too loudly about these things because I am afraid that I’ll be taken the wrong way. I fear that my words will be rejected and that I will be judged and accused of not being capable of empathizing enough with Black Lives Matter movement or “be woke” because of who I am: a white female millennial with more privileged than I can equate or truly realize that I have.
Some may consider that silence as ignorance or being part of the problem, I fear that posting this entry alone will create the very conversations that I have avoided or have not prepared to be part of.
This no longer matters to me. I know that it is truly ridiculous and now have become ashamed of my silence.
I just know there has got to be something more that we can do than just shout louder, but I have no idea what that something looks like. Right now feeling shaken and powerless, I have decided that my voice does in fact matter, just as every other person’s voice matters.
Evil Doesn’t Have A Color
The only explanation that comes to mind is that evil is winning, hatred is winning.
I can’t classify these as terror attacks or hate crimes. I can’t pick out who to blame or what to blame or how this conditioning has happened to our society.
This about misinterpretations, lack of empathy, lack of exposure, lack of training, lack of access to mental health treatment, lack of gun restrictions, hidden political agendas and irresponsible reporting. I could continue a never-ending list of reasons that have been blocking our view of the actual problem we are dealing with, a human problem.
As a nation we are doing ourselves an injustice by continuing to categorize each of these incidences by race, color, gender, sexual orientation, religion and politics. Continuing to force prioritization doesn’t seem to be leading us anywhere except into a greater divide and farther away from some sort of solution.
Lady Gaga puts this into words that I have struggled to express for a very long time.
We need to accept that letting go of these labels will not erase our histories or change our identities, but will eliminate our fears and the differences that we see in ourselves and each other that cause this separation.
As heart-breaking and shocking as it is, we need to see the faces of the victims, we need to know their names and their stories. We need to see their families because we need to humanize this inexcusable treatment to our people.
We are of a time that as humans, are seemingly the most connected, the most educated, the most aware and the most emotionally intelligent in the history of our species. But as of this moment today, I don’t even know what in my life is worth caring, worrying and stressing about when this chance of violence is lurking all around us.
Can We Unite?
As we continue to try to convince the nation with numbers in order to prove the violence is targeted, that racial profiling and segregation exists, I also see how this is creating unnecessary chatter and unnecessary debates and arguments and violence that I can no longer be O.K. with.
We can stand together to shout that enough is enough and march for equality to prove that black lives matter, but I still believe this is only skimming the surface of what needs to be done and what we can do to overcome this.
What do we have to do in order for us to tear down the barriers that force us to stand in defense of certain groups rather than stand together, undivided and agree that we ALL matter?
For now, join me here:
SUNDAY JULY 10TH
5501 EXECUTIVE CENTER DRIVE